Sunday, 27 February 2011

First Class Twit of the Year!

On Friday, my DH informed me that I had to join Twitter because it was easy to figure out and I'd be able to 'connect' better with readers... Now, I have to admit I've been avoiding it like the plague up to this point because it has 'enormous time-suck' written all over it, and what with two catering-challenged teenage boys who never stop eating, a major email addiction and a slight problem with prevarication to deal with already it's not like I need another one of those in my orbit. But I have to admit the words 'easy' and 'connect' seduced me big time. And I should add that while doing the Selfridges workshop I was asked by several of the attendees why I wasn't on Twitter, which made me feel a bit like the moment when my oldest son informed me I was the last person in the universe who didn't know how to use predictive texting.

So I decided to dive in.

Here are a few of the valueable lessons I have learned from the process:

1) If a man ever tells you something is easy DO NOT believe him (really I should have learnt that one after he suggested we have kids, but I'm a slow learner).

2) Twitter is not easy, especially if you're like me and tend to lapse into a coma if anything even remotely resembling instructions have to be read beforehand (which probably explains why I have so many pieces of IKEA furniture which don't stand up properly).

3). Despite appearances to the contrary, if you simply hit reply when a tweet appears on your mobile, you are not replying to that person, but all your followers (thanks for the tip Trish Wylie!). So if anyone was wondering why a series of disconnected Tweets appeared on my account saying things like 'Huh?' that's why.

4). I am now following 47 people, and I'm not sure I even know 47 people... It's exciting, exhilarating and totally terrifying...

5). I have 30 something followers who are going to get extremely bored following me if I don't think up something interesting to say. Which is exciting, exhilarating, totally terrifying and just as suspected, a complete time-suck.

6). Be careful about what picture you put on your profile. As your DH may tell you a perfectly innocent shot of your knees looks like something else entirely and you'll have to change it in a hurry so as not to unintentionally flash your followers.

7). If you find it hard to edit your blog posts to less than 5,000 words, writing something smart and witty and informative in 48 characters (or whatever the heck it is) is like trying to squeeze yourself into a size 8 dress again after two kids, several thousand bars of Green and Blacks and without the benefit of armour plated magic knickers. ie: Not gonna happen.

So there you have it.. Why I'm on Twitter. And why I'm crap to follow but I hope you'll follow me anyway on @HeidiRomRice

PS: If anyone knows how to link their Facebook status and their blog posts to their Twitter account, please let me know before I have to throttle my husband.


Lacey Devlin said...

LOL!!! Your first point killed me. I don't think I'm going to recover.

I actually avoid facebook and twitter and I can get away with it because I'm not a famous author like you lol. It does sound like fun though :-) The only problem is that I'm sort of attached to the whole sleeping thing :-P

Jackie Ashenden said...

I don't lurk on FB much but I do like Twitter. Mainly so I can chat to people and yes, time suck alert! But the caveat is instant advice and lovely support when you need it.
You don't actually have to say much - I kind of use it like instant messaging so I don't make grand pronouncements or anything. And I only use it for writing buddies.

Linking blog to Twitter - you need to insert a...oh never mind. I don't think I could explain even if I tried!


Brigitte said...

Oh God, your post had me in stitches!!!
I wholeheartedly agree with everything you say, especially points 1 & 2.
Have to add no, no Ikea furniture around this house.:)

Keep up the good words, Heidi, and ahem, I'm not on Twitter. Wouldn't know what to say, really.

Heidi Rice said...

Lacey, so glad I made you laugh, I'd be laughing myself if it weren't so frustrating how crap I am at this stuff. Still I took great solace in the fact that Pierce Brosnan has 16000 followers and has done exactly two tweets in four years. Now I know why I love him so much.

Jackie, as always good advice, never really got to grips with instant messaging though either sadly.

And Brigitte, see I should have taken the hint that I don't knw what to say either, and never should have joined.... Still am enjoying all the chat today about Colin Firth and the Oscars.

Julia Broadbooks said...

I'm with Jackie: Twitter is a perfect to chat with friends. Sometimes I'm on Twitter when my time would be better spent on writing or the piles of laundry waiting for me.

But Twitter is so much more fun.

Alexandra said...

LOL! Great blog! I've been twittering/tweeting for a couple of years now on and off (mostly off) and I'm still not sure what it's all about. Just got the hang of re-tweets but the hash thing has me confuzzled.

Kimberly Lang said...

I really am going to be the LAST person on earth to Tweet, aren't I?


Heidi Rice said...

Julia, fun is NOT good when it takes you away from your writing... There now I've said it, if only I could believe it.

And Alex, I sussed the hash thing, with a little help from my Facebook friends.. Now to deal with "RT" what does that mean, is it code for something?

Kim, rest assured you may be the last person to tweet but I assure you you won't be the only one who doesn't know how to tweet!